suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
