she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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