I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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