we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
How does it feel to date your dad?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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