dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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