Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Randomize