At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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