My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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