At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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