It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
