i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
