I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
