you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
