This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
