he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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