the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
