The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
