I think I just saw someone hide a body.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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