i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
