there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
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