That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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