you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
