I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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