doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
