NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
