so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
