Midget sex pt 2 tonight
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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