A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
