im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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