why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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