when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
