sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
