WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
