i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Sorry my hands just texted you
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
