I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
