Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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