sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
