btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Farmville is her only friend.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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