Your dad touched me again.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
