But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
