It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
