On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
even my farts smell like vagina
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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