maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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