that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
