Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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