Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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