I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
