what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
