I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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