I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
