I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
